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Talking Exercise

Rep? Carbs? Lats? The latest fitness craze sweeping the nation is talking incessantly about your workout.

All across America extreme athletes, kettle bellers and hot yoga enthusiasts are chatting, texting, and generally regaling each other with their sweaty exploits. Walk into any coffee bar and you will hear fit, trim young people discussing the most intimate details of their bodies, filling the air around them with tales of personal best, the nutritional value of obscure foods and the workings of hitherto unknown muscle groups.

What started simply as a way for fitness enthusiasts to compare notes, help each other out and share experiences, has quickly became a way to extend the workout experience indefinitely while lording it over the less energetic among us.

"At best I only work out for a few hours, but I can talk for days and days..." said one endorphin drenched chatterbox.

As one might expect in this competitive age, some have gone so far as to hire "talking coaches" to make sure they are nattering on effectively. Some gyms are offering specialized breathing lessons and are adding voice coaches to their fitness staffs

One new trainee was heard to say. "When I first started I could barely think of anything to say, but just a few days ago I was able to talk about my abs for so long that I put everyone sitting within earshot into a coma. Go ahead and feel them, go ahead! Amazing aren't they? I've been doing a cobination of Hot Yoga, Melt, 20 minutes with a Kettle Bell and then a few reps of Tibetian Crunches to cool down."

There is even "talk" as it were of adding this discourse to the Olympics

What is the cause of this phenomena? Is the result of parenting that makes young people think that they are endlessly fascinating? Is it the natural out growth of our society's anti intellectualism that values "experiences" over "intellect" ? or is it just that these people are incredibly shallow, self absorbed and basically really annoying?

Who can say?

I'm heading out for the gym...where are my ear plugs?

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